Cooking!

While I'm in Denver, I've chosen to enjoy having extra time to myself instead of planning every minute of every day. It's been hard to get used to feeling productive when I'm not planning my whole day, however, I am slowly, but surely learning how wonderful it is!

One of my favorite past times for a while has been cooking, and with all this extra time, I have been able to let loose and make cooking a deeper, more enjoyable experience. I take my time cutting up fresh vegetables, sneaking a piece or two before placing them in the pot/pan as I listen to my Pandora station. I'm playing with spices more. I'm learning how much better homemade sauces, jellies, and bread tastes. Most importantly, I'm focusing on mentally, emotionally, and physically relaxing while cooking so that I can use this as a tool to de-stress.

So what did I make today? Raspberry bars. And boy were they good.

The recipe came from allrecipes.com: http://allrecipes.com/Recipe/Jammin-Good-Bars/Detail.aspx

Ingredients
3 cups all-purpose flour
1 cup white sugar
1 teaspoon baking powder
1/8 teaspoon salt
1/2 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1 cup shortening ***(I used 2/3 cup Smart Balance butter)
1 egg
1 (10 ounce) jar raspberry preserves


Directions

Preheat the oven to 375 degrees F (190 degrees C). Grease a 9x13 inch baking pan.
In a large bowl, stir together the flour, sugar, baking powder, salt and cinnamon. Cut in the shortening until the mixture is coarse and crumbly. Stir in the egg. I use my hands to mix it all together, it just seems easier. Press about half of the mixture into the bottom of the prepared pan. Spread the raspberry preserves over the crust then sprinkle with the remaining crumb mixture.
Bake for about 35 to 40 minutes in the preheated oven, until lightly toasted. Careful not to overcook. Cool in the pan on a wire rack. Then cut into squares, enjoy!

Now, what made it even better is that I made the raspberry preserves from scratch! And it was SO easy.

http://www.epicurious.com/recipes/food/views/Old-Fashioned-Raspberry-Jam-230700

Ingredients
4 cups fresh raspberries
4 cups sugar

Directions
1. Place sugar in an ovenproof shallow pan and warm in a 250°F (120°C) oven for 15 minutes. (Warm sugar dissolves better.)
2. Place berries in a large stainless steel or enamel saucepan. Bring to a full boil over high heat, mashing berries with a potato masher as they heat. Boil hard for 1 minute, stirring constantly.
3. Add warm sugar, return to a boil, and boil until mixture will form a gel (see tips, below), about 5 minutes.

To determine when the mixture will form a gel, use the spoon test: Dip a cool metal spoon into the hot fruit. Immediately lift it out and away from the steam and turn it horizontally. At the beginning of the cooking process, the liquid will drip off in light, syrupy drops. Try again a minute or two later — the drops will be heavier. The jam is done when the drops are very thick and two run together before falling off the spoon.

After dipping a spoon into the mixture to test the thickness, that spoon inevitably went into my mouth, and I was shocked. This stuff tasted a MILLION times better than the stuff they call preserves in the store. 

 

I love homemade.

Lesson learned: Don't try to microwave leftover raspberry preserves without keeping an eye on it. Otherwise, be prepared for a broken plate, burnt, fingers, and lips, and raspberry preserves.

Ruin is a gift.

Out of curiosity, I started watching the movie, Eat Pray Love.  It wasn't really my cup of tea (Julia Roberts' character isn't my favorite), but I did acquire a very good quote from the movie:

Ruin is a gift.  Ruin is a road to transformation.  

This concept is one that I've learned (and am still learning) to embrace.  I love that this quote uses the word "ruin" instead of pain or trials.  When you think of ruins as in ancient artifacts, they are often broken, torn, and are missing pieces.  When we are "ruined," we go through that same process.  We become broken, torn, and have missing pieces as well.  Our Savior can fix our broken and torn hearts, and sometimes give us our missing pieces back.  

However, we often lose pieces of our lives in order to make room for a better piece.  We may not realize this at first, but as we turn to God for direction, He will lead us to that piece we are looking for.  I have always been amazed at how beautifully and perfectly it fits in my life when I relax and let God take control of my life.

  

First day at the gardens...

I made it through my first day at the Denver Botanic Gardens!!!  I'll be here for 12 weeks working on the DBG's seed herbarium, and I must say that we have a LOT of work to do.  Although today was rather overwhelming (as all first days are), I am extremely excited about this internship.  So here's what happened today:

I arrived at the Waring House (administrative building for DBG) at 8:00am to meet fellow interns for a morning of paperwork which also included multiple rounds of introductions as each intern joined the group outside of the building.  :)  After an hour or two of paperwork, we toured the gardens and all necessary behind-the-scenes facilities we would need to know about.  We were endowed with our glorious crew T-shirts that would make it "official" in my brain that I was on the DBG crew!

The logo on my shirt that makes me feel oh-so cool...

We had a nice welcome lunch with many of the staff members we were going to work with, and everyone is so friendly and fun!  They all seem down-to-earth (excuse the pun) and will all be great mentors to get to know.  After a few more hours of orientation, I got to spend time with my own mentor, Katy.

Katy is AWESOME!  And her boss, Mike, is a hoot.  I am so grateful for the people I've been chosen to work for, and the projects I've been assigned are going to stretch my little horticulture muscles.  I will be leaving this internship with a LOT more knowledge than I came in with.  What exactly have I been assigned to?  Well, I am helping with propagation for the gardens which includes many native and unique specimens.  Let's just say that I'm not germinating petunias and snapdragons all day.  :)  Also, I am going to help organize and establish DBG's seed herbarium, which is a large collection of different types of seeds collected locally as well as from different parts of the world.  I am going to learn a LOT of scientific names.  

All in all, today gave me a lot to be excited about for this summer!

Love casts out fear

Just a short entry today...

I've heard it a million times that "perfect love casteth out fear," yet I still doubt and worry.  In church, we are taught about how important it is for us to learn this simple truth instead of the Lord compelling us to understand.  I thought to myself, I don't want a tragedy to have to teach me this lesson.

With this thought in mind, I am choosing to turn to the Lord for relief from fear.  I'm replacing fear with trust in all aspects of my life which will reduce stress, increase happiness, and help me progress more efficiently.  There is no need to worry.  I don't want to be kept awake by a racing/palpitating heart, waste time thinking about "what-if" scenarios, or feel like I don't have control of what is going on.

I DO have the ability to have an amount of control in what happens to me.  Funny as it sounds, when you allow Heavenly Father to be in control, YOU start to feel more in control of your life.

For all the dirty diapers...

Happy Mother's Day!  It's days like these when we stop and commemorate someone/something special in our lives that I stop and think about how important it is to daily recognize the blessings in our lives, such as our mothers.  Not a day goes by that I don't need my mom around for something; a hug, phone call, or even simply using a technique or skill she taught me.  Without her, I would be pretty lost in life.  She taught me so many things that have literally saved my life, physically and spiritually.  She is one of the rocks in my life that I can run to and know that no matter how old I get, she'll sit on the couch and hold me close for as long as I need.  She listens to the silly drama, worry, frustrations, and struggles as well as my triumphs, pointless funny stories, and dreams/plans for the future.

There are countless acts of sacrifice and incredible strength that have gone unnoticed by me and my sisters, and not necessarily by choice.  She quietly gives everything she has for us: her time, energy, love, patience, and laughter.  She does all of this for the satisfaction of making sure we are happy.  Mommy really is the glue that holds our family together, and there's no replacement for it.

I personally am so indebted to my mom for what she's done for me.  It's not common in society for a child to have a mother who stayed at home to raise her children and did so without being a pushover.  Mom didn't take crap from us, and that taught us to do the same.  She raised three strong young women who can stand up for themselves in a world that so desperately needs people with high standards.  We are who we are largely in part because of Mom and all she taught us.